is simple: loosing weight, getting fitter, buying new, fashionable clothes and socializing, - beside keeping control over the house hold and being and good mum of my daughters. But there are few problematic points.
"What? You will run a couple of circles around our building after every meal?"My genes - what I inherited from my (both obese) parents - do not support my plan. I am not an athletic person at all. I always knew I should do something, but my parents just laughed at me when as a teenager I tried to lose weight. Later I did some exercise - when I was just myself and nobody could see my weak efforts. But these were not proper work outs. So I did not do any kind of regular exercise until I reached age 30. Then something dreadful happened. I was trying on a new jeans in a fitting room when I realised that - after leaving behind me size 10 ages ago - size 12 did not work either. And size 14 was getting closer to my mum's size - what I never-ever intended to reach...
I did manage to loose 18 pounds in two months and further four and half in the following 8 months.When I was single it was so easy to change my eating habits.It was simple to apply for a weight loss program and follow it. I bought only healthy foods -there were no temptation in my cupboard. I also scheduled my exercise program in my calendar and I stuck to it. And that was it. Pounds just jumped off from me and my pantry stayed slimming friendly in the following years.
But the situation is different now.Having a husband, a toddler and a baby this seems to be impossible.
Why he sits down in front of me to the table with a lovely looking ice cream on my juice-day? Is it fair? And how can I resist just a bite here and there when I am preparing cheese on toast to my toddler - knowing that my salad with skinny dressing is sitting in the fridge...
And I had to realize my body is different now. Not just because of my pregnancies but - well, I am ageing My body does not respond so fast and I lost physical flexibility. Lifting and carrying my daughters gives me a backache.
And just to schedule any kind of regular activity is challenging now. We have a daily/weekly routine but it is continuously changing. So only the change is permanent in our life.
I am a mother...
The other problem is that I do not want my daughters to see me continuously dieting. I do not want a quick, magical weight loss, then gaining it back and fighting with kilos again. I want a long term solution. I do not want them to "survive" my dieting periods. I know that they are watching and later copying me, - I am a role model for them now and I definitely do not want to cause them any kind of malformed relationship with food.
Even buying new clothes is a problem,as I refused to buy new dresses in my current size. I think if I bought dresses now I would acknowledge that this is permanent not just temporary size. So yes, I want my old wardrobe back.
How will I loose my extra weight what pounded up during my two pregnancies? How will I be a yummy mummy and establish a healthy eating habit in my family at the same time? Big challenge.